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Published on 19 May 2025
So, you’ve landed a home in one of the country’s most prestigious enclaves, where Ferraris hum past manicured hedges and the locals walking their dog might just be A-list actors in disguise. Congratulations! You're officially living the dream… or at least right next door to someone who is.
But before you throw a welcome party featuring your best James Bond impersonation or start practicing your nonchalant wave for the paparazzi, let’s talk etiquette. Because while the area code may be dripping with luxury, the social rules of living among the elite are unwritten and violating them could land you in hot water faster than you can say “celebrity sighting.”
Lew Geffen Sotheby’s International Realty shares their go-to guide for navigating life next to the rich and ridiculously famous, without becoming that neighbour.
1. The First Rule of Celebrity Club: You Don’t Talk About Celebrity Club
It might be tempting to casually mention at your next dinner party that Khanyi Mbau lives three houses down. But resist. Elite communities thrive on a silent code of discretion. Celebrities choose gated estates or high-security houses because they crave a semblance of normalcy. Talking about them - even innocently - can quickly earn you a reputation as the neighbourhood gossip.
Treat your famous neighbour the same way you’d treat your dentist or accountant - polite, pleasant, and entirely private.
2. Thou Shalt Not Ask for a Selfie
We get it. You're in the garden and Minki van der Westhuizen walks by with her golden retriever. Your first instinct might be to whip out your phone and document the moment - but don’t. Asking for selfies or autographs in your shared space is the biggest faux pas you can make.
When you live next to someone famous, the rule is simple: act like you belong there too. Celebs want to enjoy their morning jogs, walks with their kids or quick dashes to the car without feeling like they’re on a press tour. Channel your inner cool. A nod or polite “hello” is more than enough.
3. Respect the Hedges—Literally
Ever notice those towering hedges and carefully angled palm trees? They’re not just landscaping choices; they’re privacy statements. Celebrities go to great lengths (and spend a small fortune) to create visual barriers between their homes and the outside world.
Don’t peek, drone, or “accidentally” lean over the wall to get a glimpse of a pool party. And absolutely never let your gardener or contractor cross onto their property line without explicit permission. In these communities, privacy isn’t just respected - it’s sacred.
4. Paparazzi are Not Your Friends
If you spot a paparazzo lurking in the bushes or parked outside the gate, your job is not to tip them off, pose in the background or casually share a “hot tip” for a quick payday. That’s a surefire way to burn bridges and possibly earn a cease-and-desist letter.
Elite neighbourhoods expect residents to act as a unified front against the intrusion of the media. The unspoken motto? “We protect our own” even if "our own" just won a SAFTA award. A friendly call to security (or a discreet wave to let your neighbour know) is always the better move.
5. Keep Your Parties Classy - and Quiet
Yes, you might live next to a rock star, but that doesn’t mean you should try to out-party them. Loud music, late-night pool parties or open-invite events can rub your high-profile neighbours the wrong way, especially when they’re used to a tightly controlled atmosphere.
The occasional elegant gathering? Totally acceptable. Weekly rave with DJ Khaled impersonators? Hard no. Keep the volume - and the guest list - tasteful.
6. No Name-Dropping in the HOA Group Chat
Don’t be that person who writes, “Hey @SiyaKolisi, your recycling bins are still out 🫣” in the neighbourhood group. Online community spaces are for discussing potholes, gate codes and lost cats, not for playful celebrity jabs or subtle flexing.
Remember, elite enclaves often have private WhatsApp or Signal groups that are as heavily curated as the guest list for the Met Gala. Your etiquette in digital spaces is just as important as your behaviour on the street.
7. Mind the Help: Your Staff Reflects on You
In luxury communities, your household staff are seen as an extension of your household so make sure they understand the importance of discretion and boundaries too. Gossiping about who came over last night or which celeb’s dog made a mess on the sidewalk could create major friction.
Train your staff to operate with the same level of professionalism expected inside a five-star hotel: friendly, efficient and always tight-lipped.
8. Be Normal—It’s the Coolest Thing You Can Do
Ironically, the ultimate sign of being “in” with your celebrity neighbours is being completely unfazed by their stardom. Saying “Good morning” without gushing, offering a cup of sugar without awkward small talk about their last film or just walking your dog with zero agenda speaks volumes.
Celebrities are surrounded by people who want something from them - what they don’t have enough of is neighbours who treat them like anyone else. Being effortlessly normal is the most elite behaviour there is.
9. Don’t Try to Network, Pitch or Promote
This is not your chance to soft launch your own music career, promote your cousin’s clothing line or suggest a collab on your YouTube channel. Celebs are off duty at home and any attempt to mix business with casual encounters will be seen as opportunistic, not charming.
10. Remember: You’re Not Just Living Next Door, You’re Part of the Brand
Elite neighbourhoods are like luxury brands - carefully curated and deeply protective of their image. Being a good neighbour to the rich and famous means understanding the privilege of your proximity and handling it with grace.
So keep your camera down, your curiosity discreet, and your community spirit high. Do that, and you won’t just survive celebrity neighbour culture—you’ll thrive in it. And who knows? One day, it might be your hedges people are whispering about.
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